When is enough, enough? When do life’s challenges become so overwhelming that you know something has to change? Well, let’s talk about it.
I’m the type of person who’s had a lot of bad things happen to me over the course of my young life and I have handled it all pretty well up until now. I don’t care to go into great detail but I’ll say this, I’ve seen, heard and dealt with way more than I should have and I’ve grown tired of the same problems. Now, many people will judge me and say “Quit making the same mistakes”. I’m not making the same mistakes yet, I’m having similar results.
I have had a lot of problems for a while now and people don’t seem to understand. I’ve always had some complications with family, people who think they are friends and won’t go away, ex’s, newbies, financial, sexual and physical. The list continues to go on and on and I’m the go to person for every single problem known to man and yet, I certainly don’t have that kind of support in return except on WordPress. I have some pretty great followers here who I can very much relate to. I’m nearly up to 70 followers now and it’s amazing. All I do is write about all the BS things in life and yet, people enjoy my stories and my struggles and I really appreciate that.
Over the years, I’ve tried to gain support and appreciation apparently in all the wrong places. I’ve tried getting people to notice my struggles particularly on Facebook and even family continue to go unnoticed when it comes to myself and my feelings. I think that’s why so many blogs are written here.
It’s surprising how much people who are somewhat depressed will look for validation from others. The solution often recommended is medication. There’s a medicine for everything these days yet, there are no real solutions. It’s like here take this pill so that you feel better about your bad situation. That’s not a solution to me or anyone else. Then you have the fake supporters, you know the one’s who don’t really want to deal with you. They are the one’s who say things like “Everyone has problems”. Again, this is superficial and isn’t a solution. There are a lot of people who have a problem every now and again and there’s a lot of people who need to carry an umbrella constantly, there’s always a heavy rain cloud hanging over their heads and nothing ever works out.
For those of you who have something constantly hanging over your head, you’ll completely understand and you’ll be just as frustrated as I am with the superficial people who have no idea what’s going on. Yes, people have problems but, there’s a lot of people that you’ll notice who have superficial problems. The example is “Jane has an engine that won’t start and she requires a new starter for her car”. That’s a temporary problem that doesn’t qualify as “Everyone has problems”.
I think that I’ve always been a person who’s had too many downfalls and I’m incredibly frustrated by it. I’ve always tried to give people the benefit of the doubt and I’ve helped an incredible amount of people. I’m the one people come to when they want money, someone to vent to, someone for support of some kind and so on. When I want something, I have zero support, everyone disappears. Who else has had that problem? (Please comment below)
Why is it that the people who suck the most life out of you, are never around when you’re in need? What is it that makes people be less empathetic towards situations similar to yours? They are so trusting of you to help them but, they are not trusting enough of you to help you and I know, it sounds like a rant but seriously, I’m so burned out at this point with the way things go and the way that good people are treated like crap and bad people are treated like Kings/Queens. So now the question begins, do I continue to be a good person and suffer or do I become the person who refuses to empathize with anyone, not help anyone with money and collect on that happiness? Since I’ve tried being that great person my whole life, I think I’ll try the other side since the good side has never worked. It seems that the world is a fend for yourself kind of world.
I’m writing an update about my son who has Autism because, I recently read something that made me feel really bad. My son will be turning 2 years old next week and every since he was born, I have been receiving newsletters from babycenter.com about his development. You know, it’s a newsletter they send via email every month that tells you “Your child is now X months old” and it goes on to tell you what your baby should be doing by that point, milestone wise. I recently received a newsletter that said “Your toddler is now 23 months old” and inside the first sentence was “Your child should now be speaking at least 50 words”. I can tell you that it was a true wake up call and it made me feel really bad. I love my son more than anything in the world and I try to not define him by being Autistic but, it really hit home because, my son speaks 7 words and the rest is babble that cannot be understood. He’s learned 1 new word in 4 months.
I have been attacked by people stating that I’m a horrible parent and that I’m obviously not spending enough time with my son and I’m not reading to him or trying to teach him new words. Are you kidding me? I spend countless hours with him using flashcards, educational shows and even educational puzzles that show the picture and the word, letter and number associated with it. For some reason, it’s not registering and I’m doing the best I can so, I feel really bad when people call me out and say I’m neglecting him. I haven’t found very many resources that could help him or me. I don’t live in a populated city, we have less than 2,000 people here and there are no resources in this area. I do take him to an autism center an hour away and even they come to the house sometimes and work with him but, he still isn’t improving and they said he could stay stuck like this forever.
Does anyone else have autistic kids and what did you do? I would like to hear your stories if you could please comment, I need resources!